All the Empire Records sounds are sampled at 11kHz.


explain.wav (224k)

Joe: Let me explain it to you. Mitchell's the man, I'm the idiot, and you're the screw up; and we're all losers. Welcome to music town.

today.wav (53K)

A.J.: What's with you Today?
Lucas: What's with today, today?

luck.wav (31k)

Gina: Good luck. Don't screw it up.

137.wav (193k)

A.J.: Do you think it is possible for someone to be in love with someone else and not even know it?
Lucas: In this life, there are nothing but possibilities.
A.J.: Well, that's good, because I have to tell Corey that I love her by 1:37.
Lucas:That's an excellent time.

glueit.wav (203k)

A.J.: Wow. You did have hair when you went in there, right?
Debra: Yeh, it's still in the sink if you want to glue it. Hey, Lucas I heard you committed the perfect crime.
Lucas: Not entirely perfect.

lucasent.wav (982k)

Joe: Lucas......?
Lucas: Joe.......?
Joe: Where's the money?
Lucas:Joe, the money is gone.
Joe: Yeh, I know it's gone. Where's it gone to?
Lucas: Atlantic City.
Joe: Atlantic City?
Joe: Is it coming back from Atlantic City?
Lucas: I...I don't think so Joe.
Joe: What's it doing in Atlantic City?
Joe: Re-circulating...?
Lucas: MMMMeeehhhh
Joe: (Joe knocks done bucket of coins.)
Lucas:Are you pissed off Joe?
Joe: Lucas?
Lucas: Joe?
Joe: Lucas?
Joe: Lucas listen to me. I told Mitchell Beck that you forgot to deposit the money. I told Mitchell that the money was still here.
Lucas: Joe, that's not true. It's in Atlantic city. I swear.
Joe: Shutup...sit down and don't you move.
Lucas:It could be in other cities by now..
Joe: Oh, shutup. Under no circumstances are you to move from that couch. Unless it's to get me $9,000, and then you bring it here to me. Ok?
Lucas: Joe, I think it's going to be Ok.
Joe: What makes you think that?
Lucas:Who knows where thoughts come from, they just appear. MMMeeehhh.
Joe: Moron.

welcome1.wav (33.5k)

Gina: Welcome to music town. May I service you?

angry.wav (1059k)

Joe: You all having fun?! I hope so! Don't let me stop ya. Keep dancin'. Cause you better do it now. Because, by next week, this is going to be a music town. And I don't think they allow dancing in MUSIC Town.
Lucas:What are we suppose to do instead, Joe?
Joe: What am I going to do with this guy, uh? WHAT should I do? Turn him into the police. Send him to jail. Who do you think he's going to come to when he wants bail. Who, me, right? What should I do? Put in my own nine grand, then I'm screwed.
Lucas: Don't worry Joe, you're a superb manager.
Joe: alright....
Joe: Keep it up Lucas.
Lucas: Superb.
Joe: Say it again.
Joe: (Joe grabs lucas and drags him into office for his beating.)

luctrble.wav (538k)

Joe: Lucas are you in trouble? Did you need the money? Because, if you are introuble you can talk to me, you know that?
Lucas:Joe, we're all in some kind of trouble, am I the only one that see's that? You know Deb's in trouble, and A.J.'s in trouble.
A.J.: A.J.'s not in trouble.
Lucas: And Corey's in trouble.
A.J.: Corey's not in trouble, she's going to Harvard.
Lucas:Mark's in trouble, Eddie's in trouble.
Joe: Ok, I'm the one who's in trouble here. Because, every minute that goes by, and I don't call the cops; I look like a bigger banana head.
Lucas: Joe, I can say categorily that you are not a bigger banana head.
Joe: You screwed me Lucas. You know that don't you? What do you want me to do. Paul Mitchell tell him that I lied.
Lucas:It seems like a viable option.
Joe: I swear to God that if you are fooling with me, I will kill you.

dmnman.wav (20k)

Lucas: Well, damn the man!


Joe: Why don't you hold these up to your chest, go over to the wall; and let them take some photgraphs of you?
Warren: Why don't you shove them up your ass?
Lucas: Because that would hurt a lot, Warren.


Lucas: Mitch. Mitch....Mitch......Have you met Warren?
Mitchell: Who are you?
Lucas: Lucas. I work here. Have ya...met Warren? Cause I wanted to talk to about Warren. You see, young Warren came into the store today and put on a little demonstration for all the store employees. Very motivational. It was inspiring. And, gosh he made quite an impression on everybody. I'm intrigued, I'm spell bound.


A.J.: Hey Joe. I need to ask your advise. I know you know about love and women, and all that....
Joe: Oh Yeh.... My wife left me for another woman and my girlfriend forced me to leave at gunpoint. Does this qualify me?
A.J.: Ah yeh, definitely.


A.J.: Bye Warren..
Warren: I'm gonna get you.. I'm not playin' this time. I'll be back and you'll be sorry.
A.J.: woooo. You'll be sorry (mocking Warren).
Joe: I'm already sorry.

bucket.wav (15k)

Joe: Come on bucket head !!


Berko: I heard a story about you.
Lucas: Really, which one?
Berko: I heard you stole $9000, went to Atlantic City and that there's a contract out on you.

damnman.wav (94k)

Mark: Damn the man save the Empire....

damnman.wav (1.08MB)

(Joe plays the drums)

guts.wav (52k)

Joe: How old are you?
Warren : Old enough to kick your butt through your skull and splatter your brains on the wall.


Eddie: Hey Lucas man, I heard that you like went to Vegas and married a mobsters wife and now there's a hit out on you.. is that true?
Lucas: Not entirely true.
Eddie: Oh, well, outlaw man.. we salute you.
Lucas: Well thank you Eddie.


Jane : Do any of you like Rex's new record?
Warren: (Laughs..) Dance party USA teeny bopper type of shit right?
Jane: Uh, it actually tested well amongst teenage males.
Lucas: Jane, did you compare the percentage of teenage Rex Manning fans to the incidents of homosexuality amongst teenage males?
Warren: (Laughs)
Jane: Na..No.

look.wav (121k)

Gina: Well Shanade O'rebellion. Shock me, shock me, shock me with that deviant behavior.
Debra : That is so clever. I swear you get smarter the shorter your skirt gets.

minds.wav (32k)

Lucas: Always play with their minds.


Warren: Who glued these quarters down?
A.J.: I did.
Warren: What the hell for man?
A.J.: I don't feel that I need to explain my art to you, Warren.

regret.wav (54k)

Lucas: I do not regret the things I've done, but those that I did not do.


Debra: No visible tattoos.
Gina: No revealing clothing.
Debra: We're both screwed. At least you're used to it.
Gina: Now Debra, don't be bitter. Certainly with your ever growing collection of flesh mutilating silver appendages and your brand new neo-nazi food camp make-over; the boys will come a runnin'
Debra: Let's not fight, let's just rip.


Lucas: Help you with anything?
Warren: No.
Lucas: You like music?
Warren: Yeah.
Lucas: Me too. (whispers) The fat man walks alone.
Warren: What? What are you some kind of weirdo?
Lucas: That's a big coat you're wearing, lot's of pocket room.
Warren: Yeah, see ya.
Lucas: I'm sure I'll bump into you.
(Lucas begins chasing Warren.)


Debra: Hey A.J. I made you a button. Stupid.
A.J.: Debra your just in time. Surprise!
(Rex Manning song plays.)


Lucas: Who's your favorite singer?
Mark: Axl.
Lucas: Well, if Axl Rose was driving down the highway and saw Rex Manning stranded on the side of the road. Do you think Axle Rose would stop and help him?
Mark: Does Axle have a jack?
Warren: No way man, Axle would spin the wheel, take aim, pound the gas; and take that sucker out.
Lucas: Warren, Warren, where do you get this hostility from?

words.wav (114k)

Lucas: In the immortal words of the Doors, the time to hesitate is through.


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